Maybe a little background.

Okay, here's a little background. Til I get bored. Its late and Im tired, so this will most likely be so very disorganized. For that I am sorry. I wish I could snap my fingers and have it all down in one little paragraph.. But I suppose if I could sum up my life in one little paragraph it would be an awfully lame life. Needless to say, youre missing a lot.

-Home? I have two homes. I've moved back and forth between two places kind of a lot.

-Socializing? I am 21. I am 21 and don't really care to drink & party. That alone pretty much makes me a social retard, huh? Really, I love being drunk, just not enough to think its worth the puking and headaches. Top my lack of partying with the whole marriage and baby thing and ta-da, you have a social leper. I don't quite mesh with kids my age, yet I'm not quite able to mesh with a much older crown either. They are just condescending and well, annoying just like kids my age. Needless to say, I dont have many friends. Well, I take that back. I have friends. Mostly old friends. Its just I dont like very many of them. Or to put it kindly, "We dont have much in common." (anymore. Or did we ever, really?) Obviously, I dont go out much.

- What do I do?I'm very happily a stay at home mom. Although, that does get trying, especially for someone like me who has no patience as Ive mentioned before. Regardless, Im happy about that. I love spending my days with my daughter, and I love that I am raising her myself as opposed to a daycare provider raising her. She has been breastfed, never once having formula. (Yet another quality that makes me a social outcast! Kids my age prefer to use formula so they can push their babes off on whoever will take them as much as possible.) She is a very easy baby, so you wont find many complaints about her here.. Although you will find plenty of complaints about all kinds of other stuff.

- Marriage? I am married, happily, mostly. No, I am not happily married atm, but I love my husband very much. Things are just difficult at the moment because I have not lived with him in over a year, therefore I have had our daughter by myself for over a year, I have slept alone for over a year, I have missed him for over a year. He is a US Marine. Which basically means a. yes, hes a great, strong guy for serving the country and all that. b. hes a complete ass, yes, everything youve heard about Marines, its mostly true. c. this leaves me feeling alone, unimportant, unappreciated, forgotten, neglected, and so insufficient as a wife a lot of the time. Especially since as a man, he wasnt that great at communication and emotions and all that before joining, much less after. Dont get me wrong, I love him. He and our daughter are my whole world. I knew I'd love him the moment I met him. He has a good heart, a great smile, and he makes me laugh. Sometimes I forget to lighten up and laugh lately. He puts up with my picky ways. He puts up with my all too often migraines, my lack of adventurousness, my mean streak... lol He is a good husband. This whole military thing is just tough.

- What next? I am waiting. Soon we are making a move across the country. We will then have our own house. Ill have my husband back. Hopefully, "next" is my life finally starting.