Here we go again.

A year or two later, and I find myself needing to vent again. A separation, lies, more lies, and hurt later, and here I am, back with him, and back to feeling like shit. I used to make fun of girls like me. Haha.

Baby sign language, among other things.

So many say "my baby's speech is delayed but he/she knows multiple signs!"
Duh, idiot.
I have so many objections to this new fad of teaching your babies baby sign language. The top two being:
A.) If you teach your baby to sign, it eliminates the need to speak. Therefore, of course speech is going to come later. They can already communicate their needs.
B.) If you are going to do this ridiculous thing, why would you teach them "baby sign language" instead of American sign language? At least with American sign language, they my get some use out of it later.
This of course falls under the same category of annoyances I have as people who spend $125 on sunscreen for baby. Honestly, my baby wears Panama Jack baby (or whatever is decently priced and close) and shes never been burned nor is she hurt in any way.

Not in the same category are:
Young mothers who formula feed so that they can pass baby off to whichever relative allows it. Mothers these days find all kinds of excuses and "medical reasons" why they cant breast feed. Honestly people. How do you think human kind made it?!
People who breastfeed into toddler years. Need I say it? Disgusting.
A.) There is no scientific evidence that extended BF has any real positive affects.
B.) I would not appreciate my earliest memories being of me sucking on my mothers breast. Ew. Im all about BF, but my daughter is almost 12mo and getting ready to be weaned. Ive done all the good I can for her, and really, she only nurses to sleep now. No longer for her nutrients.
C.) As my dad would say, "If the child can eat a steak, no more need for formulas/breastmilk." Seriously.
These extended BFers like to pretend they let the child make all the decisions, hence why they dont wean. They call it "baby led weaning." Really, it should be "mother led dependency." They want their children to be forever babies. Its sick and a selfish act. My daughter and most other little ones I know love food, want food. Hence why a baby begins showing interest in food. When these extended BFers choose not to let these older babies try solids, they arent letting their little ones make the decisions as they stupidly intend on doing.
These subjects were brought up because I was scanning through the blogs on here..
It reminds me of the forum I once loved but was so turned off of by the ridiculous notions of these crazy people. They breastfeed forever, homeschool (or even "unschool," wtf), call the Lion King incestuous and refuse to let their children watch it, wont let their babes watch TV at all, nor eat solids, they cloth diaper and spend crazy amount of money on ridiculous unnecessary things. Then they try to peg you as an unfit mother because you dont adhere to their ways. Ugh. Im all for certain aspects and I agree our society sucks sometimes, but honestly, I do not want to raise my child under a rock (or a boob, in this case) and create a social outcast who will never be able to find her place in the world. In other words, Im not really against homeschooling if done properly and socialization comes into play, Im not against cloth diapering, cosleeping, wanting the best, etc. (I am against not allowing your kids to watch Disney movies!) Its the crazies who take it all too far! Its like they want their babies to be babies forever, never knowing anything but their mothers.


Anyways. I am currently sitting on my floor waiting for my daughter to wake up for her nap. Also waiting for my husband to get here. (hooray! Its the weekend!) Also waiting for some food to miraculously appear in the fridge. Hmmmmm...

Maybe a little background.

Okay, here's a little background. Til I get bored. Its late and Im tired, so this will most likely be so very disorganized. For that I am sorry. I wish I could snap my fingers and have it all down in one little paragraph.. But I suppose if I could sum up my life in one little paragraph it would be an awfully lame life. Needless to say, youre missing a lot.

-Home? I have two homes. I've moved back and forth between two places kind of a lot.

-Socializing? I am 21. I am 21 and don't really care to drink & party. That alone pretty much makes me a social retard, huh? Really, I love being drunk, just not enough to think its worth the puking and headaches. Top my lack of partying with the whole marriage and baby thing and ta-da, you have a social leper. I don't quite mesh with kids my age, yet I'm not quite able to mesh with a much older crown either. They are just condescending and well, annoying just like kids my age. Needless to say, I dont have many friends. Well, I take that back. I have friends. Mostly old friends. Its just I dont like very many of them. Or to put it kindly, "We dont have much in common." (anymore. Or did we ever, really?) Obviously, I dont go out much.

- What do I do?I'm very happily a stay at home mom. Although, that does get trying, especially for someone like me who has no patience as Ive mentioned before. Regardless, Im happy about that. I love spending my days with my daughter, and I love that I am raising her myself as opposed to a daycare provider raising her. She has been breastfed, never once having formula. (Yet another quality that makes me a social outcast! Kids my age prefer to use formula so they can push their babes off on whoever will take them as much as possible.) She is a very easy baby, so you wont find many complaints about her here.. Although you will find plenty of complaints about all kinds of other stuff.

- Marriage? I am married, happily, mostly. No, I am not happily married atm, but I love my husband very much. Things are just difficult at the moment because I have not lived with him in over a year, therefore I have had our daughter by myself for over a year, I have slept alone for over a year, I have missed him for over a year. He is a US Marine. Which basically means a. yes, hes a great, strong guy for serving the country and all that. b. hes a complete ass, yes, everything youve heard about Marines, its mostly true. c. this leaves me feeling alone, unimportant, unappreciated, forgotten, neglected, and so insufficient as a wife a lot of the time. Especially since as a man, he wasnt that great at communication and emotions and all that before joining, much less after. Dont get me wrong, I love him. He and our daughter are my whole world. I knew I'd love him the moment I met him. He has a good heart, a great smile, and he makes me laugh. Sometimes I forget to lighten up and laugh lately. He puts up with my picky ways. He puts up with my all too often migraines, my lack of adventurousness, my mean streak... lol He is a good husband. This whole military thing is just tough.

- What next? I am waiting. Soon we are making a move across the country. We will then have our own house. Ill have my husband back. Hopefully, "next" is my life finally starting.

Here we go.

I'm sitting here watching my little one play on the floor, waiting (yes, already waiting; seems I picked the perfect name for my blog already...) for her to be ready to go to bed. She was already in bed.. til SOMEONE slammed a door and now shes wide eyed and bushy tailed.

I'm agitated at the world today... Lately it seems like Im agitated at the world every day. As much as it sucks for anyone who has to be around me, it really sucks to be stuck in my head. I dont particularly enjoy being agitated, being annoyed by everyone and everything.

Its just, Ive been waiting for my darling husband for over a year now... (oohrah.) I'm waiting for my own place again. (Anyone every stayed with in-laws? Or worse, their own parents?) I'm waiting to get out of this hellhole middle of nowhere state. I'm waiting for something all the time. I could go on and on about all the things I am waiting for. And really, lets face it, I never was a patient person.

So I begin blogging, to pass the time as I'm waiting. I watched Julie & Julia and feel like I need a project like she had. Perhaps I'll learn to cook too. Or quilt... Or paint again. I've been waiting til I had enough supplies to pick art back up, but I sure do need something... Im a wife, a mother... and lately, that feels like about it.

And ta-da. Here comes the dear daughter whining at me. Buh-bye for now.